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Jan
25

Becoming a parent is just the beginning

By Richard Woolven, Trustee

There can be no denying that undergoing fertility treatment is a stressful experience. Those of us who have faced the tests and injections, the prodding, the pitying faces, the mocking, the indifference and the thousand other indignities are all too aware of just how much of a struggle it can be. But, in my experience, one of the hardest things has been the expectations of others now that we have our family.

I would not for one second change the outcome of our treatment and I would endure it again if we were back at the beginning, but there is a feeling that somehow everything should now be perfect. That we should somehow be able to simply put the strain of the past behind us and live our lives in endless bliss, filled with the joy that having children can bring. That having got through treatment with a successful outcome we should need no further help, should never be allowed to moan or be tired or get angry or frustrated.

But we are parents and parenting is a struggle at the best of times. Parenting after the emotional bulldozer of IVF is harder still.

So, while those of us who have our children will always be grateful to people like Mark, Laura and Cathy, my fellow trustees, who have given so much of their time and their genes to help create families like mine, remember that our need for support does not end with a successful pregnancy. For all of us it is in fact the beginning. The beginning of something wonderful, but a journey in which we still need help and support and guidance from those that care about us the most.

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